To get into college, ask
Q: How should I tackle a ‘college of’ application (containing an exam, multiple essays, letters of recommendation, etc)?
-Curious about college
Dear Curious,
There are three steps you need to take to tackle these applications:
1) Go to the college you’re applying for and ask the counselors/advisers exactly what they’re looking for and what they want.
2) Go to Career Services. They have walk-in hours Monday-Thursday. They’re awesome at helping you with the written portion and they also do mock interviews. Did I mention this service is free because you’re a UNM student?
3) Repeat. The key is to start, build, and maintain relationships with these people. Once they help you with getting into this college, make it a priority to keep in touch with them. They can help you throughout the rest of your collegiate career and are valuable resources when and after you graduate, too.
4) Finally, go out of your way to show them appreciation. They don’t get enough of it for all they do, and genuinely making an effort to let them know you’re thankful for their efforts often will result in them both remembering you and being more willing to help you in the long term.
Sad, single Christmas
Q: As the holiday season is approaching, sometimes it brings on loneliness from not having a significant other. Granted, being single right now is where I need to be for my life, but let’s face it: who doesn’t want a special someone to share the holidays with I thought of going to festivities or holiday events with friends, but seeing as most of them are in relationships, naturally they are going to go with their “person.” Being the third wheel isn’t always fun. Do you have any suggestions so I don’t miss out on the exciting events of this holiday season?
-More melancholy than merry
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Dear Melancholy,
I’ve found singleness to be just as much of a blessing as being with someone. Being single is just as complex, and has its pros and cons, too, just in different ways.
One of the downsides is that feeling of wanting another person. I don’t think that’s bad or abnormal. I think everyone really wants to find someone to love. Love is wonderful and worth pursuing.
However, don’t let emotions or negative thoughts about being single keep you from enjoying this holiday, or any other day for that matter. Happiness is a choice. If your thoughts and emotions control your actions, take control of those so you can have a happy holiday.
To have a positive attitude, sometimes you have to say to yourself, “No, I’m not going to think negatively about this situation.” Choose to wake up every day and count your blessings.
Do you have clothes on your back? Food? Some sort of shelter? Are you in college? There are so many people in the world who don’t have these things and struggle for them every day. Be grateful for those things and ask yourself what really matters in the long run.
That’ll help put things (regardless of the situation) into perspective.
Emotions can be hard to tame, too. You feel whatever you feel, right? Sure, but you choose whether to accept or reject those feelings with your actions. If you feel lonely because you’re single, don’t sit at home alone or put yourself in a situation where you’re the only single person around. Both will eat away at you mentally if you let them. Call up a friend or two who are also single and just spend time with them, not wallowing in singleness but doing something fun or silly. Make a memory!
I think that’s what these holidays are really about: making memories and being with others. Spend time with whatever family you have, regardless of how the relationship is. That’s your family, so love ‘em. If you don’t have any living relatives or perhaps they’re too far away for travel, get with friends or co-workers. There are few things more fun than a “Friendsgiving” or holiday party.
Similarly, if you know someone who doesn’t have somewhere to be with others, invite them to join you in whatever it is you do.
This can be intimidating for some if you have any feelings that your family is weird or different and you’re self-conscious about that. Don’t be. If you open your heart to letting someone see something as personal as your home and your family, people will be grateful and honored you’ve invited them in. More so, they’ll feel loved and valued and you’ll have a richer holiday experience with them there.
Holidays like the ones we have coming up in the next month encourage us stop and refocus from our day-to-day grind and to give of our time, emotions and devotions to people. Maybe more than anything else this holiday season, tell those around you how much you value them and what they mean to you. Go out of your way to give of yourself and I guarantee you won’t feel alone this holiday season. In the words of Dave Matthews, “When you give, you begin to live.”
If you have questions that need answering, please send an email to Wooleysweeklywisdom@gmail.com He’d be more than happy to answer any questions or concerns you might have. Be sure to check out his facebook page, ask-ryan-wooley.
