Former pornography addict Gene McConnell says we live in a sex-saturated culture that reduces women to little more than body parts and distances us from what we desire most - an intimate relationship.
McConnell served time in prison for an attempted rape that he said was partially caused by years of reading pornography and visiting prostitutes. He spoke at UNM Wednesday night as part of the "Power of Porn" presentation sponsored by the Campus Crusade for Christ and other groups.
He was joined by Kimberly Drake, a former stripper, who discussed how the pornography industry and drug use nearly destroyed her life and marriage.
After showing a video of UNM students' opinions about pornography, McConnell told the near-capacity crowd in Woodward Hall that he was not advocating outlawing pornography.
"I don't support censorship - that's a slippery slope," he said. "It would be a big mistake to think about censoring pornography. I'm here to tell you that you should be able to consume anything you want to. But the question is, should we?
"My goal is to give us some insight into the business; I'm not here to tell you what to think."
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Another video featured a collage of advertisements, music videos, popular television shows and movies that McConnell said were filled with sexual images that had become part of the mainstream.
"There isn't anything we don't use sex to sell as a culture," he said.
He then cited a series of statistics that he said revealed how popular pornography has become.
"Americans spend more money at strip clubs than at all other Broadway, off-Broadway, independent theater and other performances combined," he said. "There are more strip clubs than McDonald's - it's become a staple of our culture."
McConnell said pornography amounted to a $10 billion to $14 billion per year industry in the United States, with $56 billion spent on pornography annually worldwide.
"It's a bigger business than professional football, basketball and baseball put together," he said.
He used his personal experiences as a worst-case scenario for the negative effects of pornography. After reading pornographic magazines since the age of 12, he molested his 14-year-old sister when he was 16.
Later, he married, and when his wife did not fulfill his emotional needs, he returned to pornography, strip clubs and prostitution, he said.
Eventually, after driving his wife and teen-aged daughter to develop eating disorders and other problems, he was jailed for attacking a woman in a parking lot. He said the look of terror in the woman's eyes stopped him from raping her, but when he let her go, she got his license plate number and turned him in. The experience made him realize what pornography does to men and women, he said.
"I'm not saying that everyone who consumes porn will be a rapist, but everyone in this room is affected by it," he said. "The porn and fashion industry is a measuring stick to what is sexy. If you don't fit in, then you're not beautiful. This promotes and encourages body shame."
He said he considered porn a form of hate speech.
"No one that I love would I treat like they treat women in porn," he said. "It just glamorizes, eroticizes and sexualizes hate."
He said he didn't think there was anything wrong with enjoying a woman's body, "but when we reduce people to objects, we can do anything we want to them because they aren't human."
Tonight at 7 p.m., McConnell and Drake will explain how they escaped pornography and turned their lives around.
Several students said they appreciated the program and that it made them face aspects of pornography that they hadn't previously considered.
"I thought it was good - it's impressive that he wasn't here to impose his views on us," UNM freshman Stacey Rich said.
Sophomore Marc Ripperger agreed.
"It exposed the truth behind porn," he said. "I really think it's something that comes down to everyone yearning for intimacy, but porn puts up a false intimacy."
Senior Julie Murray said she enjoyed the program, but thought it was too simplified.
"He portrays all women as incompetent and easily swayed, and men as predators," she said. "There are people like that in society, but we don't need to fear it. Not everyone will have these experiences."
